This week, I'm pulling out every single stop I can find in the service of destroying the Dallas Cowboys, and that means increasing BEEFTANK's height to 7 feet. He is a 5-foot, 400-pound, faster-than-the-Dickens quarterback who always runs and never, ever throws. I try to use him sparingly and only when he is desperately needed - this is the 30th episode of Breaking Madden, and only his fifth appearance. SUMMON CLARENCE BEEFTANK, THE HERO OF BREAKING MADDEN.Ĭlarence BEEFTANK has been with us since the very beginning of Breaking Madden. That is why this episode of Breaking Madden is committed to their absolute destruction: If there's another, we'll probably crash into the Moon. Now he has his Dukakis Tank Moment, and our next president will be Gary Bauer.Īll that from one Cowboys playoff win. Chris Christie, who was watching from the owner's box, into a toddlery huggy happy fit. Such a thing is so rare and disruptive that it can't even happen without perhaps throwing a presidential election into chaos. The Cowboys won their second playoff game since 1996. After calling a pass interference penalty against Dallas, and even announcing it over the PA system, they quietly picked up the flag as though the last thirty seconds hadn't happened. Late in Sunday's playoff win over the Lions, the officials couldn't find the same page. In the natural world there is thunder and lightning within the indoor, fluorescent world, there is miscommunication and stupid bullshit. The Dallas Cowboys play under a roof, and must make their own storms.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |